Lilac and Lime

Contrasts in colour, contrasts in life – Mary Bruce

Ladies’ Knight

Last week it seemed Storm was wildly in lust. He has had his moments in the past but it would be disrespectful to recount those. Being just a teeny bit otherwise, two tales have slipped through the net.

Georgie, the gentle little soul who kept digging her way under the fence until one day we weren’t in time to get her back, was the object of his desire. They’d rattled along together and chased each other around the garden like best buddies for months. One day I came home from work to find Georgie standing on the front lawn gazing agonisingly at me from one eye through her long fringe. Storm’s hormones apparently don’t activate in slow release form but in potent detonations. A clutch of these must have ignited simultaneously on that afternoon and blinded his inner compass. Deeply engaged in catering to his carnal urges, he failed to notice that Georgie was facing the wrong way and in danger of losing the other eyeball. Maybe affronted by the combination of discouragement and badly muffled human snorts, he desisted from further activity on that front for months but a week ago he became quite naughty about running a few houses down the road whenever the gate was open.

We have a rather nice looking neighbour who owns a Husky female that was the object of his desire. The ludicrous nature of a stolid Jack Russel gazing lustfully up at a Husky in a raised garden behind a significant wall was lost on him. Unfortunately for me, I met the neighbour who was a lot further over the fence than his pet, howling with laughter. I’ve chosen to assume it was because of Storm and not me shamefacedly snatching the delinquent and plonking him in the car (I’ve given up running down the road after him or the neighbour would have been comatose but still laughing). It wasn’t the first time I’ve promised to take Storm home and make him watch educational TV to purify his thoughts (not *that* kind of educational).

For a few days Storm became quite serious which we put down to threatened canine paternity claims arising from the wicked thoughts emanating from our property. And then the new neighbours moved in and Storm’s priorities moved in an entirely different direction.

We have two new (female) Ridgebacks on the property, along with a (female) cat to go with our (female) cat. The new pet that amuses me the most is an African grey parrot who has such a repertoire of sounds and moods that he deserves a post of his own.

Apart from recognising a logistical improbability, Storm has shown no indication of anything other than good neighbourly intentions. The girls are settling in rapidly but have very inscrutable expressions. With a gaze like the one below, I’m sure he recites his seventeen times table backwards during any eye contact in case they mind read.

Image

As far as I know they have both had litters, but with gazes like that we’re inclined to think they arranged surrogates or turned off the lights.

All in all, we’re settling down comfortably while Storm watches his bees and queues.

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